This weekend had me pondering whether across Australia men will declare Christmas 2011 ‘the most disappointing Christmas ever’. Here’s my reasoning …
On Thursday night the Burswood Dome, or ‘Bouncy Castle’ so named by Jeremy Clarkson, hosted the final leg of Top Gear Australia. Clarkson was joined by James May and Shane Jacobson in what was essentially a taste of their long running TV show. Clarkson had been gagged somewhat after his recent outbursts about striking workers, which left the show feeling slightly scripted in parts. Still Jacobson did his best to step up and the testosterone drenched audience didn’t seem to mind.
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Half way through an assortment of high speed crashes, wheelies, and flame throwers came a moment a respite as ten high-end cars patrolled the Dome. With only one car residing in Perth, the realization about the transport and insurance costs helped put the shows ticket price into perspective.
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Copious orgasmic sighing from the much hyped audience had me hurriedly lifting my complimentary Top Gear Magazine off the floor. A second slower and it would have been lost in a sea of high octane drool.
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Later as I watched most of the crowd leave, (except for those with ‘paddock passes’ who were moving backstage where the cars were on display), I pondered the flow-on effects of the unfortunate scheduling of Top Gear Australia so close to Christmas …
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Should someone put out a Community Announcement warning wives about the dangers of asking their precious two year old daughter to gleefully hand over a pair of socks, to a man whose heart was set on a Maserati, particularly socks with a Lamborghini car motif?
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Similarly perhaps husbands shouldn’t be left in charge of lighting the gas BBQ for fear of them trying to replicate one of the flame throwing scenes.
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Do not, repeat do not try to placate them with half strength beer or eggnog.
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If you’re a teenager whose father went to Top Gear and mother went to the Linneys Pearl/Diamond show I suggest you go to Christmas in the Park and try pleading your case to the Salvation Army.
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Have Lifeline been informed?
Stay tuned for more posts about the Top Gear show.
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